The Last Devil in The DMV
It's the devil in me that wanted to keep my randomly issued license plates 666 QUX when I changed cars this week. I'm not really a Satanist, but it does help to speed up slo-pokes in front of me up when they see the Devil filling their rear view mirror!
Today I made the mandatory slog to the DMV to pay my tax, title and tag fee and to register my devilishly deep dark red Subaru Forester. This story is not about the manifestation of evil in most DMV's across the planet. Actually, the DMV in Fort Collins, CO is modern, clean and efficient as the lady robot voice calling out the bingo numbers for the lucky participants in the tag and title dance. Now Serving B-65! If one plans ahead, brings the right documents and gets there 10 minutes before they open, you will be out of there in 15 minutes flat. The staff is always courteous and not huffy or impatient. It is almost a treat to be served so politely at a government office. It is certainly appreciated.
The story here is one of exorcism and rebellion. A story of exclusion and one man's fight to keep alive a number purged from the records of the Department of Highway and Motor vehicles. My registration went smooth and quickly as Tammi typed my digits into her terminal. She handed me my receipt and a new set of tags. I was slightly taken aback. I thought I could keep my old tags. I had grown fond of them in the past three years as I terrorized the town of Fort Collins in my tiny blue Honda Fit. When I asked Tammi if I couldn't keep them and I told her why (the numbers), she was largely taken aback.
"Why would you want to keep THOSE numbers?" She asked perplexed.
"I have grown fond of playing devils advocate." I told her, with a mischievous wink.
"Most people want to return those numbers when they come up," Tammi informed me. "In fact, the DMV has purged all of them from the system.
My, how politically correct everyone is becoming these days I thought. I could not determine if she was from the "other" political party so I stayed polite myself and said, "Wow! I guess I have collector plates now!" which, indeed, I do. I am the last voluntary Devil in the DMV. Isn't that special!
